​Love & Spiders 9

Why do you stand so far away?
If you’re afraid then go away

If you think I can only deceive
Then it’s time that you should leave

I wish I could just walk away
I wish you’d listen when I say

I have only one heart to give
I have only one life to live

Do you think me heartless and blind?
Ever consider I am both and yet still kind

I didn’t mean it when I hurt you
It was not what I meant to do

Do you hear how choked up I am
It hurts me to, don’t you understand?

I want you here in my arms
So you can turn my cold to warm

But I see from the look in your eyes
You think me capable only of lies

With that thought you are wrong
I don’t believe what I’ve known all along

What I know and what I see
Are different worlds in the void of me

You are most beautiful in my eyes
And the reason my heart sings and sighs

It’s so very hard to choose
When I have so much to lose

I only ask for what you will give
Either way I will go on and live

I have no choice, as this is my lot
This is my world, it’s cold and dark

You can leave, walk out of my sight
You have the option of returning to the light

I can’t help how I deeply I feel
Looking at you is such a thrill

But my wound it still bleeds
And no cure for wounds like these

And my heart it screams and cries out
For this love I’ve dreamed about

I have fantasies and I have dreams
You are everything they’ve all come to mean

And I am dead without me here
And I am dead living with this fear

I wish… I wish I knew what to do
I wish just once you loved me to

I can only love what I love
I offer that, if it is enough

You have a choice to stay or go
Listen to what your heart does know

I will always love you in your dreams
That’s been enough so far it seems

Where are you going? Don’t run away
We have all night if you’ll just stay

Talk to me because I am cold and so alone
Talk to me of this love for me you have known

I have loved you my entire life
None more so, than on this night

You are my every dream come true
And all my soul is my gift to you

I can give you nothing more than me
But I’d give it all for us to be

Just once one from two
I’d give it all just for you

Then come to me and hold me near
Come and love me despite your fears

I can be honest and I won’t lie
And I promise I won’t make you cry

Because this isn’t all I dreamed of
No matter what I still need love

Isn’t this what you want to do
Don’t you want me to make love to you?

I want it more than all I am
Will you love me all you can?

I will love you all I can
I know well just who I am

Come here now to my embrace
I’ll clean your tears and kiss your face

I will love you all I can
I know well how cruel I am

Oh my! You tremble so
Now you’re here and now you know

I can’t love you with all I can
I already love all that I am

And I hate you and what you’ve shown
I hate the one thing I’ve never known

That is to love unfettered and free
To love someone… as much as me

Oh you tremble and rightly so
What comes next you already know

I will pierce you with my act of love
And I will drink all of your blood

Because I hate you for loving me
Something that awful can never be

And when my hate becomes my desire
You will die loving this Black Widow spider

© 2007 Mark W Lucke
08/07/2007 at 02:11PM
“from darkest wells come blackest hells”